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{31 Days} When You Just Need a Break!
I want to preface the following post by apologizing on not being here the full 31 days – since I didn’t post Friday or Saturday this week!
An interesting thing happened this week – I hit a wall. While I had posts written for the past couple of days, I didn’t publish them for whatever reason. They may come up later in the series, they may not ever see the light of day.
Writing about being overwhelmed is pretty easy for me – especially when I am currently in that life stage right now. I think that the problem is when I am trying to give solutions, when there may not be solutions right now for me.
One that I have been concentrating on is changing my thinking, but that is so incredibly difficult to do.
Why is it so difficult?
I have been asking myself this a lot lately – why is is so difficult to change. I think that part of the reason is that I like to control things so much, and when I am not in control of situations, I obviously feel out of control and that leads to more feelings of being overwhelmed.
Recently I have been thinking about our busy schedule coming up through the holiday season, and it has stressed me out before it has even started. That is never a good thing.
What are some ways I can change this?
My husband and I were having a discussion on Saturday about ways that I could overcome some of these overwhelmed feelings, especially when our two older kids will be involved in sports through the winter. I’m not sure we came to any real strategies to change my thinking, but it did push me to want to read some parenting books again.
I think that part of the overwhelm comes from my feelings of “am I doing enough”
Are the kids in enough activities? Are they happy? Are they thriving?
As a parent I tend to prioritize my kids over myself. I think that is true of most parents, but it is in those stressful, very busy times, that I remember what I wrote about self-care last year, and how important it is to remember that if I do not take care of myself, how am I going to take care of anyone else.
Clearly this post is not a prescriptive post, but I do find that when I am overwhelmed, writing is something that helps.
When I started blogging, everything was a free write for me. Every thought I had seemed to make it down on paper, or in my case the blog. And when I started Townsend House way back when, it continued in a similar fashion.
I would love to say that I have all the answers, but I most certainly do not. And that is what I am trying to convey back to you today.
I needed a break, and I took a break, and it was good to take a step back and re-center myself.
Hopefully going forward, I can keep self-care in my mind, and understand that there are some unique boxes I need to check as an introvert, and remember to check those off my list!
How do you practice self-care when you feel overwhelmed? What if you aren’t able to take a step back, and instead have to keep moving with the activities of the day/week/month/season?
I see so many young women these days trying g to "keep up with the Joneses". I think being overwhelmed is a warning to your self that it's time to ask yourself if all this activity is really needed in order to be happy. Kids all in sports and after school hobbies that require going somewhere for a class. Kids need down time and time with parents to relax and know each other and connect. It's good for them to be bored some in order to learn to be creative and entertain themselves or just lie on the bed and think. You are not a bad mom nor harming them if they are not enrolled in everything possible or constantly busy. You are not a failure if you don't have the latest makeup or expensive types from Ulta or Sephora. Your house doesn't have to measure up to Martha Stewart's. You don't have to have all the latest gadgets. The pressure everyone let's themselves be put under today trying to compete to be better or as good (in the world's eyes) in taking all the joy out of life and just "being" with loved ones. It has become more about doing and going and getting and winning than it is about loving and connecting and knowing and savoring moments . Relationships should be #1 before activities or things. Make room for God too. That will help a lot. Take a Saturday and pile on the bed, mom and dad and kids, no TV, no phone, no games, just lie there or sit there and talk. Ask questions. Silly ones, fun ones, how do you feel ones. Play. Joke. Tickle. Laugh. Have a picnic in a living room tent made from a sheet and the couch and chairs. Let the kids build it. Slap pb& j on bread or order a pizza and eat it in your tent/fort. Play a board game. Relax later with a movie. Put the kids to bed early and get back in bed and have some pillow talk time. Back rubs and soft music and a heart felt talk about how important you are to each other. Fall asleep early and forget what you have to get done. I promise the world won't end if you do this regularly. Taking kids out of some activities won't forever damage them. Maybe do something different after school that involves a project together like teaching them to cook and letting them help make dinner. Learn to do some old fashioned things together like a veggie garden or sewing. Those are the memories you will all cherish even more than a kid's touchdown or homerun or ballet performance. They want mom and dad one on one most. At least half of the time. And people need friends. So many are so lonely now because they only connect on social media and that doesn't hold a candle to face to face connecting. Call an elder to ask advice on how to do something instead of using Google. They will feel remembered, loved , needed and worthwhile if you do, and not so lonely. And it may just make you feel less stressed. Us older folks have been replaced by Google and feel lonely and useless. We grew up connecting with other human beings face to face. We feel forgotten and would love time with grandkids and you. We could even babysit which would give you a break. Just food for thought by a middle aged lady.
I tend to be really good at keeping things flowing, maintaining the status quo, even if I feel completely overwhelmed, run down, and distressed. It's a good quality to have and at the same time it makes it hard to practice self-care. Stopping myself from just trudging on and ignoring my own needs can be dangerous, I think.
When I'm feeling overwhelmed I try to take a step back and really evaluate what is going on and what I can get rid of. Typically I get overwhelmed because I say "yes" too often. I've been working on that!
Omg this was me today! I just had it with everything so I gave myself a little time out. Did the trick!
It's vital for me to take a time out. Helps me clear my mind and get back even better.
Sometimes you just need to take a break! It's perfectly okay and normal. Taking a time out can refresh your creativity and the imperativeness of self care is such a necessity in today's world.
Suzanne | MaQ + Suz
http://www.suzannespiegoski.com
I really need to get better about self care!! So important to take a break and take care of your self.
If we don't take time out for ourselves we won't be fully present for our loved ones. Everyone of us deserves a much needed break to recharge our batteries and rejuvenate our bodies and minds. It is important for our survival.
self care is a must! you have to fill your own cup before you can share!
Self care is so important. Taking breaks are also really important. I really love to go to our family's hytta to unplug and take breaks! It really helps to center me.
I feel less stressed once I make lists and establish routines. I own two blogs, and one post per week/per blog is my comfort zone. Initially, I wanted to churn 1 post a day and it was quite stressful. Thank you for the post.
You bet we all need a break from time to time rethink our priorities and move on. However sometimes can be challenging getting that time off too. In that case a nice latte and deep breaths.
Squeeze in a bubble bath if time allows?
Self-care for me comes in the form of a hike and maybe some wine!
Taking a break can be hard sometimes. Thanks for sharing this post!
Taking a break is hard for me so I totally get it. When I feel overwhelmed I try to write about it, or go for a walk, or just veg as hard as it is.
If I start to feel overwhelmed–which happens a lot when you are trying to help a very determined to have her own way 94 year old (in November)Mom and a cat who is also bound and determined to have her own way–and clients who need me for every little thing–Well–I just ignore the phone, crawl into bed with a good book–and mindlessly pet the cat-no getting away from her!!
In other words I become a happy hermit for a day!!
It's definitely good to step back and reassess when you're overwhelmed. This does happen to me sometimes!
Breaks are very important and I haven't been that good at taking them. From my experience, I need to take them more often as I have reached burnout. Thanks for this!
Having breaks are super important. I recently had one and it helps to clear you head and gather your thoughts.
Blogging has become such a stress reliever for me. It keeps my mind busy and focused on something that I love.
We always need that breakmfeom time to time, self care first then others follow.
Love!
It's such a busy time of year! I know I have been feeling overwhelmed and I am working on getting organized, but I need to work on the self- care bit!!
Spa days or night swims at the beach are my ways of taking a step back when overwhelmed. Great post!
We are just humans, not machines or robots. We all need a break to relax, have fill ourselves with energy and come to our routine.
It is so important to take breaks and take care of yourself! I have so often felt overwhelmed but would just push through it. Unfortunately, all that stress took a toll on me and eventually my body forced me to take a break. There was a period where I wasn't able to work, drive, go to class, my life was on hold and I had to finally take care of myself. Luckily, I did and I'm on a road to recovery and getting my life back to normal again but I wish I would've taken some breaks before all that happened. Good luck, dear, and take care (of yourself!) <3
I've recently found self care went out the window and have become overwhelmed by various things in life and I've realized, I have to pull that little bit of strength out of me and pull through and get things done, one day at a time. I do want to incorporate a bit of self care soon, at least, in the form of reading a book, wrapped up in a cozy blanket with a warm Fall candle lit (or two or three). All the best, honey!
I had writer's block for what seemed like years. But I finally decided to start writing again. it's been challenging, but I've noticed when I keep at it, even just a little at a time, I feel so much happier. Hope you get the break you need.
I've struggled for the past month with feelings of being overwhelmed. This was so perfect in its timing
Spacing breaks taking turns taking a weekend with friends all these have helped me considerably!
I think we should taking care self first, and having a "Me Time" is also important.
Being overwhelmed can be tough to get over especially if you haven't thought of any plans to counter it. I think it's good to take a breather and think about everything that you need to finish. Put them in a list and create a schedule for everything.
Taking a break is very important. Even I do the same. It does help me !
Rita | http://www.styleroundtheclock.com
I think I need a big break. I have been just taking little breaks here and there and that is not enough. You really do need just to uplug for a period of time.
Take a break whenever you feel overwhelm. I hear that a lot. As much as i want to, im stubborn. I guess I am always waiting till I reach my boiling point.
Self care is so important, to take care of everyone else you need to first take care of you.
Self love and care is the most important…and most difficult. We can't be everything to everyone and that is OK.
Time off is always necessary!!!
I'm a Mom too who definitely gets overwhelmed as times. Sometimes I have to take a moment and unplug from the world for the sake of my own well being as well.
Oh definitely I need a break now:P
Self care is so important, what a great piece!
It is so important to take a break when you need one. Otherwise you can lose your mind. I know I take the time to read daily. It helps.
Writing helps me deal when I'm feeling overwhelmed too. Also, decluttering and having a more simple home has helped a ton! I am learning that saying "no" to things is really key
Breaks are good but you must really unplug and take time OFF